How many cats have you got? We have five, we didn't mean to have five and thought three was more than enough. In fact if you decide you want more than three I think it is compulsory that you take a psych examination, its for your own benefit.
Oban had replaced our old cat and we were quite happy to settle down as we were. That would have been the case if it hadn't been for a taxi Journey. One of us has a weakness for certain breeds of cats and here was the taxi driver telling us about a passenger in the car the previous day with a cat and her six kittens of a certain breed. There was a very sorry tale and the cat and the kittens had been rescued. They were checked over by the vet and the rescuers agreed to look after the cat and the kittens. When she got back in the taxi, the taxi driver saw them and fell in love he offered a home for one. He was busy telling us about them the next day and he happened to mention the breed, Oh no. The taxi driver was asked to see if the woman had homes for the other kittens if not we could offer a home to one, the rescuers said they hadn't got a home for one of them and we could have him when he was old enough, whoo hoo.
The morning eight weeks later dawned and one of us was so excited. The Taxi driver turned up at our house with a cat basket and mentioned that there might be two kittens. In for a penny in for a pound. The two kittens duly popped their heads out and had a look around no shyness just a curiosity, they where soon out and exploring the terrain. After having single kittens it was good to have two kittens that could play chase and fight together cause trouble and blame each other.
The two kittens are an unusual breed, their behaviour is more like that of a dog than a cat. They love water but don't like to be in it. Once the kittens were big enough to get in the bath it was hilarious. They would paddle in puddles and flick water everywhere. Their favourite game was to chase their tails in the bath. They would spin faster and faster until they collapsed in a heap of legs, tails and water. They play fetch with rolled up pieces of paper, they like human company and want to be with humans all the time. Going to the toilet, the bath, making a drink, working, gardening two cats would accompany you to make sure you didn't get lost.
We had got two boys and we needed to think of names for them. Different whisky names were considered and we had a few contenders. We had been told we were getting a boy and when we received the two it was still supposed to be boys so neither of us thought to check. It wasn't till one of us noticed that one was more endowed than the other that we thought to question it. On closer inspection we found out we had a boy and a girl. Two fine single malt whiskies were chosen Tobermory and Jura.
The Male became Tobermory, Toby for short. Jura for the female. Jura the female turned out to be the most laid back of the two, this cat can take Armageddon in her stride. she has no aspirations and is quite happy to take things as they are and settle in in her own little niche. Tobermory is a big bundle of cuddles who has found out there is a hierarchy. He isn't particularly interested in being at the top of the heap but is interested in not getting any stress from the other cats and if he is on top of the heap there will be no stress. So far he is boss of Jura who is happy to be bottom of the heap and Oban who is older than him. Supremacy over Oban has been obtained through fighting. When the kittens first arrived Oban was so excited he had someone to play with. At first all he had to do was tap them with a paw. there would be a Phhhsssst and kittens would explode into spiky bundles of fur with a mohican down their back and a tail twice its normal size. Oban would let the kitten settle down and then tap the other and that too would explode like a air bag. As they grew we had to watch out that Oban was not too rough and had to rescue the Kittens a few times from an over enthusiastic Oban. As Tobermory grew Oban and him have fought it out. They both go in for the throat and who can stand it the longest is the winner. For a long time Oban was superior, unfortunately for him Tobermory grew. It is part of his genes that he is one of the largest domestic cat breeds, so it was inevitable that he would defeat Oban. Oban has taken it in good heart and relief, before his mum was the superior and who can fight with his mum when she can grab you by the ear and tell you its time for bed, it is a case of Awwwhh mummmm, I don't want to. Oban was quite happy to answer to Toby rather than his mum it made things much easier.
As I mentioned before Tobermory just wanted an easy life. Between him and that goal is Talisker. She brooks no argument over this but Tobys size is giving him the edge and it won't be long before she capitulates. As for Socket Tobermory has no intention of fighting him and once Talisker has been defeated Toby is quite happy to pretend the arthritic Socks is the leader of the pack. We remember seeing a program about the Cats that live in the ruins of Colosseum in Rome, Ceaser was a ginger and white Tom and had been top cat for a many years. He was eventually defeated by Brutus (who was probably his son, grandson or great grandson), but rather than being ostracised and excluded from the pack Brutus let him enjoy a happy existence, he sunbathed, ate and left all the mating and procreating to the young while he had the time of his life. The same will happen with Socks and Toby.
All the cats sleep on the bed with us at night, Jura likes high places and would perch on top of the highest cupboard or door but after a while would like to join the heap on the bed. She did this by jumping from her high spot onto the bed she found the best place to aim for was the soft bit in the middle of the humans. It made a great noise as she landed on one tummy then bounced onto the other and the humans would immediately sit upright from being fast asleep. This didn't last long as the humans learnt to sleep on their sides and that wasn't as bouncy when she landed. Toby liked to snuggle he would find the gap in the quilt at the neck and then make his way down the human back he would then roll over and sleep back to back with the human. This was fine until he decided to chase anything that moved, any legs moving would be punctured arms would be savaged and toes chomped on. Still we let them stay it was all part of the fun of having cats, I am beginning to think we are masochists, the bruises scratches and wounds we have would make anyone think there was domestic violence going on in the home. They would be right they just wouldn't guess who was the cause.
Well that is a brief introduction to all the cats read on more to find out more about their lives and the havoc they cause.
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